ARTICLES

Missing Link - Gone AWOL
November 7th 1997 Loren Coleman steps in with a Special Report on the even-more-elusive-than-we-thought orang pendek, Blather gets pedantic with Mexican lake monster reports, and even more damned flying ships from ancient Irish texts.

Stoking the Bonfire
October 31st 1997 It has come to our attention that a certain backlash has erupted against the works of Bram Stoker, author of 'Dracula', and the traditional celebration of Halloween, or 'Samhain'. Blather launches a defence of vampires and ancient Celtic rites.

The Smoking Cannon
October 23rd 1997 A cannonball rips through Leonard and Kathy Mickelson's mobile home, in House Springs, Missouri, and Blather attempts to link this to the 17th century 'Annals of the Four Masters' compiled by a bunch of monks in Donegal.

Baltic, Missing Links, Globs
October 17th 1997 Welcome to Blather of the Baltic, playboy of the Skagerrak, who is now safely ensconced again in Nua HQ after some Scandinavian adventures, from which I returned relatively unscathed, save for the media exposure and arson accusations. This weeks Blather tells of Yeti Movies, little hairy men and fishy globs. . .

Passports for Aliens?
October 9th 1997 This week I'm afraid that I see fit to launch into a timely if somewhat hopeless diatribe against tabloid newspapers in general, and that pinnacle of quality journalism 'The Sunday Mirror' in particular. The article in question, 'Aliens in Co. Roscommon' was dated 21st of September 1997, and showed 'aliens' with the caption 'ALIEN NATION: One of the "space people" who landed in the US 50 years ago'. Shall I go on?

Kanga-ruse. . . Scapegoat or Spacething?
October 2nd 1997 For many years now, I've noticed, with alarming regularity, the loyal sycophants and peasantry at Castle Blather tripping over their leg manacles and muttering such bizarre utterances as 'Huh, kangaroos, yeah, what next'. It was only last week that curiosity eventually got the better of me, and nothing would do but for me to whisk a collection of them off to the torture rooms for questioning. The shocking conclusion that I was appalled to reach, after they had been wheeled back to their cubicles and I had collated their wretched accounts, was that an alarmingly large quantity of reported anomalous animals had been described as 'kangaroo-like'.

Beginning To See The Light
September 25th 1997 In last week's issue, 'Blather on Tour', I reported the strange case of what *could* have been defined as an harassment by a UFO, which took place between Killarney and Mallow, in south west Ireland. But on Friday morning, as the Blather entourage arrived amidst the cheering populace to the gates of Nua HQ, we were greeted by a delegation despatched by the honourable Mr. Shane O'Sullivan, a native of the fair region referred to above. I commanded one of my sycophants to unfurl the scroll, and clutching my monocle with my highly developed eye-muscles, discovered that the document indeed carried information of not inconsiderable portent.

Blather on Tour
September 18th 1997 Even though last week's Blather popped into everyone's mailbox without incident, this Blatherskite was not actually at the helm, but instead was mountainbiking around Achill Island, Co. Mayo, hunting for giant 250 year old otters in Leitrim, chasing boojum snarks in Co. Kerry, and investigating UFO investigators in Co. Cork.

They Don't Make Them *That* Big. . . Do They?
September 11th 1997 In yet another amazing report from Reuters, a 'black boa constrictor the size of two passenger buses slithered by' the Peruvian village of Nuevo Tacna, deep in Amazonian jungle. This creature was allegedly 40 metres long and about five metres in diameter, felled trees, and left 'a ditch wide enough to drive a tractor through'. Also this week we bring you Ghostly Jaywalkers in Co. Meath, and we invite anyone who has not considered the extraterrestrial hypothesis to cast the first stone. . .

Who Dunnit?
September 4th 1997 Are you fed up with the 'news' recently? Blather did really intend to ignore the death of Princess Diana, but due to a phenomenon which Blather diligently (honest!) examined in 'One of Our Bombers is Missing' , that is, the mushroom cloud of conspiracy which surrounds every high-profile death, I was compelled to start sorting through the insane plethora of conjecture and speculation. So far, the Royal Family, MI5, the IRA, the CIA, the Vatican, the Freemasons, aliens, Elvis, JFK, the MIBs, Rupert Murdoch, Hillary Clinton, Iranian terrorists, and even the paparazzi have been blamed for the deaths of Diana and her boyfriend, Dodi Al-Fayed. Other theories explore, or nay, demand, that she is alive and well and hiding with Al-Fayed.

New Animals from Vietnam
August 28 1997 The remains of a previously unknown deer-like animal were displayed in Hanoi recently, making it the third 'new' mammal to be 'discovered' in Vietnam in the last five years. 50 million New Zealand sheep get blamed for global warming, and the U.S. Air Force announce their Fair Weather Flying Machine's fatal flaw.

Curiouser and Curiouser
August 21 1997 In Blather 1.11, 'Where's Me Kidney?', I mentioned the UFO conference to be held in Cork City on 16th August. Any decision about travelling to Cork for this event was promptly put on the long finger, but lay around in the back of my mind like an unpaid bill. Despite the fact that I had made some preparations, and told people that I was going to Cork for the weekend, by Saturday morning I still really hadn't made a decision. Was I really about to brave the intricacies of the Irish rail system to attend a conference which might be an utter waste of time? I barely made the 11:25 Intercity to Cork, and spent the journey between reading 'Irish Eccentrics' by Peter Sommerville-Large, and questioning my sanity...

Blessed Virgin Elvis
August 14 1997 The infamous 'moving statue' of Ballinspittle in Co. Cork is back in the news again, crowds are being drawn to the grotto where the BVM (Blessed Virgin Mary) statue allegedly 'moved' in 1985. If you think that's strange, read about Toon Nieuwenhuisen in the Netherlands, who claims that his Elvis Presley bust is shedding tears. And as far as we know, the remains of The Elephant Man are still in London. . .

Cat Amongst the Pigeons
August 7 1997 It would seem that Blather 1.12, 'I Don't Want to Believe' has managed to raise many a hackle in the ranks of its recipients. Ironically, having stated my opinion for the sceptics who thought I was a 'UFOhead', I was attacked for being 'narrow-minded', 'ignorant' and 'arrogant' by those who appeared to dislike my exploration of these theories. This week's Blather also stars some Kamikaze Dolphin Healers and Rats From Outer Space.

I Don't Want To Believe
July 31 1997 As the captain of the goodship Blather, I constantly get asked, 'Do you believe that extraterrestrials are visiting our planet?', but no one believes me when I say I don't. This week, Blather questions the ExtraTerrestrial Hypothesis and explains why there's no real grounds to have any faith in it.

Where's Me Kidney?
July 24 1997The classic cautionary urban myth. Guy meets girl, guy gets drunk with girl, they go to her room, guy passes out, wakes up in bath full of blood and ice with a telephone nearby and a note telling him to ring the hospital because he's had a kidney removed, which supposedly prevents charges of attempted murder. . . Also more about Big Cats and Bantry, with no apparent connections between any of these topics.

The SAS, Aliens and Big Cats
July 17 1997 This week it looks like the silly season has really kicked in, this time with an army boot. The People (British newspaper), Sunday, July 13, had an article entitled 'SAS In Alien Riddle', which told of the experiences of eight SAS soldiers waiting to ambush IRA gunmen in south Co. Armagh, in Northern Ireland. The July 1997 issue of the BBC magazine 'Wildlife' has a rather hyperbolic cover story entitled the 'Beasts of Dublin -- Craze for macho pets lets loose wild animals on the streets'.

Raining Toads
July 10 1997 A good classic anomaly, how it warms the heart. On July 5th, Associated Press reported a rain of toads in the Mexican town of Villa Angel Flores, in the Pacific Coast state of Sinaloa. Dr Jack 'Death' Kevorkian is still knockin' them off, and as usual, more on the Bantry UFO flap.

Anatomy of a UFO Flap
July 3 1997 Blather this week is a tasty brew of the latest on the never ending stream of madness currently pouring out of south west Ireland . . . Just recently, Blather was fortunate enough to exchange information with a staff member of Radio Telefís Éireann about the current Bantry (Co. Cork, Ireland) UFO flap. Just when Blather had its back turned, that is, whilst in the Netherlands conducting urgent business of international importance, RTE had given news coverage to the Bantry UFOs.

Planet Earth - Wired to the Moon?
June 26 1997 The entire planet, it would appear, has lost the plot. In this morning's newspapers, on the Web and in my email, the quota of bizarre news surpassed what I usually see in a week. It's the 50th Anniversary of Arnold's UFO sighting, the USAF have released another Roswell debunking report, the Pope sorts out all our cloning queries, Eva Peron is back in the news, and the California ashes mystery is solved. Kind of.

Dr. Death Rides Again
19 June 1997 Yes, euthanasia advocate and unlikely hero Dr. Jack Kevorkian has once more escaped the clutches of justice, after his fourth assisted suicide court case ended in mistrial. Plus, an Aer Lingus UFO incident, a smidgen more about the Sligo UFO Hoax and more on the Bantry UFO flap. UFO's everywhere. I wonder why?

Clones, Ashes, Exorcism and Drunk Cows
June 12 1997 Fancy having offspring who are exact clones of yourself? Reckon backing up your kids in case of a system crash is a good idea? Now you *can*. . .plus: warehouse full of human ashes. . . exorcist jailed for murder. . . and a cow dies of whiskey excess.

Sligo UFO hoax, Wexford antelopes, exploding kerrymen and belated poltergeists
June 5 1997 This week's Blather is going to be a mish mash of Irish topics which have been meandering about in my head, waiting patiently to be spooned out to the masses.

Intergalactic Tourists Hit Cork?
May 28 1997 In 'The Examiner' (Cork) of Saturday 10th May 1997, Áilín Quinlin reported a 'UFO' had been filmed by a British film crew who were in Bantry, Co. Cork, researching sightings of alien spacecraft. Apparently the area has been plagued with 'UFO's' for the last two years. The 'sighting' filmed by the Carlton TV crew is due to be shown on ITV in a two-part documentary entitled 'We are Not Alone'.

Milking Men? Cows Might Fly!
May 21 1997 This time round, the Czar of Blather has decided to pass comment on several topics which are causing much consternation in Nua HQ.

According to Jared Diamond, professor of physiology at the University of California in Los Angeles, 'All men have a latent potential to lactate and there have been rare cases of this happening naturally. At first, however, it would have to be induced artificially. What is this man blathering about?

Moo!
A couple of weeks ago, a bizarre story appeared on the Forteana mailing list. It told of Japanese fisherman who were locked up by Russian authorities after reporting that their trawler had been sunk by a cow which had fallen from the sky. Urban legend or truth stranger than fiction? Blather investigates.

May 13 1997:You know, it's rare that I fail to be amused over peoples tendency to draw the craziest conclusions from flimsy evidence. I refer, of course, to the recent fun and games which took place in Colorado, where the US Air Force are striving to recover debris of the A-10 aircraft which disappeared on April 2nd while flying on a routine training mission in Arizona.
For eighteen days before debris was spotted, buried in deep snow on a mountainside, all sorts of crazy speculation was rampant on the internet concerning the apparent fate of the A-10 and it's pilot, Capt. Craig Button.

Vol 3 & 4 (June 1999-2001)
Vol 2 Issues 27-43 (Nov 1998-May 1999)
Vol 2 Issues 1-26 (May 1998-Nov 1998)
Vol 1 Issues 27-52 (Nov 1997-May 1998)
Vol 1 Issues 1-26 (May 1997-Nov 1997)