Trio of stoned nerds take two hours to turn Playstation 3 on
A trio of inebriated thirty something nerds, struggled vainly for two hours last night to turn on an early prototype of the Playstation 3. Monged beyond all reason, the three software programmers used every means at their disposal to play a game of 'Tiger Woods Golf', but were thwarted in their efforts by a panoply of cables, an obstreporous television and an enormous bag of weed.
'I've been living out of three houses these last six months' said Orville McGregor, a 32-year-old Scottish database engineer, 'and I've had every bloody DVD player, laptop, games console and telly give me shit, but this just drove me crazy. I was doing fine: we had a blue screen, clearly indicating a connection of some kind, the Playstation was on and the disc wasn't scratched so it should have worked. But then Fletch said something about Rush Limbaugh being addicted to pills after he'd had a pop at Marty McFly for being 'off his meds' and I laughed solidly for fourty-five minutes. I had to go for a piss twice'.
Helpless with laughter, the three men simply sat on the floor, laughed like a shower of twats and occasionally refilled their glasses. Margie McGregor, Orville's wife, arrived home from the pub to find her husband in a haze of smoke, watching Tom and Jerry cartoons, surounded by empty wine bottles, smashed Playstation game-boxes, and roach material.
'I leave him alone for five hours and this is what happens' said Margie, shaking her head wearily. Orville's friends made a hasty exit down the drain-pipe and then struggled to get home for a further four and a half hours because they couldn't agree where they lived.
We contacted Sony for their thoughts, but there was no-one available for comment.
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