Lightbulb removed from prison inmates’ ass

Doc: So what seems to be the problem?
Bloke: Well, there seems to be a lightbulb up my arse.
Doc: Uh huh. Looking for something were we?
Bloke: Yeah. I had a terrible itch and…
Doc: Ya huh. Grand so. Well, just drop yer cacks there and let me have a look…

Doctors, nurses and indeed anyone that works in the medical services, has one of these stories. A few years ago a cousin of mine who works as a paramedic in the US rang home to inform us that he had just removed a cucumber from a guy’s asshole in the back of the ambulance. Cue much hilarity about ‘cucumberectomies’ and so forth. And here’s another one:

‘MULTAN, Pakistan (Reuters) – Fateh Mohammad, a prison inmate in Pakistan, says he woke up last weekend with a glass light bulb in his anus.
On Wednesday night, doctors brought Mohammad’s misery to an end after a one-and-a-half hour operation to remove the object.
“Thanks Allah, now I feel comfort. Today, I had my breakfast. I was just drinking water, nothing else,” Mohammad, a grey-beared man in his mid-40s, told Reuters from a hospital bed in the southern central city of Multan.’

As always here at blather, we welcome comments and stories. So if you have a thriling story of derring-do, involving lube, foreign objects and your jacksie, we’re all ears.
More:
Operation to remove light bulb from inmate’s anus: from Reuters.

damien

Damien DeBarra was born in the late 20th century and grew up in Dublin, Ireland. He now lives in London, England where he shares a house with four laptops, three bikes and a large collection of chairs.