Nigerian government warns citizens to watch out for conmen in the UK

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Nope. That headline is not a piss-take. It’s real. The Nigerian government have issued a warning to it’s citizens to be wary of UK conmen who will try to scam them out of their hard-earned…

‘Fraudsters in Britain might pour tomato juice or other substances on your dress and then offer to help remove it, robbing you in the process, the information ministry warned in its first-ever travel advisory obtained by Reuters on Thursday.
The conmen, who are mainly white, but also include east Europeans and north Africans, might also pretend to pick up an object from under a potential victim’s seat to distract his attention while he robs him, it added.
“Nigerian travellers are hereby warned not to carry large amount of money on their body and ensure that their air tickets, passports, expensive wrist-watches as well as trinkets are securely hidden,” the advisory said.’

Later today, the IRA will be issuing a statement warning it’s members to beware of Bank managers coming to rob their houses, Gardai opening fire outside post-offices and shop-owners rackateering ‘volunteers’ into financial disaster.
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From Reuters

damien
Damien DeBarra was born in the late 20th century and grew up in Dublin, Ireland. He now lives in London, England where he shares a house with four laptops, three bikes and a large collection of chairs.

2 comments

  1. Sounds reasonable advise to any traveller. Whenever I go to London I make sure I distribute my money/cards/ticket home about my person so at least I can get home in the event of someone pickpocketing me. It helps to look broke too.

  2. To:Mandaga Ncube, Nigeria
    Dear Sir,
    I have recently inherited a great whopping wad of cash, however I wish to avoid the penalizing tax laws here in London so I am offering you a fantastic oppurtunity! Simply send me a cashiers check for 5,000 pounds to cover the transfer cost of moving my millions into your Nigerian bank account.
    Please reply as soon as possible!
    Sincerely,
    Nigel Suckerscrewer
    London, England

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