The Hibernian Conspiracy
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We've been saying this for years. Years!

Ivory - does it really come from elephants?
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Ivory - does it really come from elephants? News finally reached Blather.net that our beloved Australian pin-up icon Rupert "I think it would be fun to run a newspaper" Murdoch has taken over National Geographic  magazine, for all intents and purposes. D'internet, of course, has reacted, with umpteen redesigned Nat Geo covers that speculate on a rather more Fox News editorial direction rather than the dry, boring and altogether too honest house style that Nat Geo has been relying on since 1988. Get over it, kids. The question is, why did Nat Geo sell up? The answer? MONEY.

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According to the The Irish Independent and The Irish Times, coroner Dr Kieran McLoughlin has found that a 76-year old Galway man, Michael Faherty, died of Spontaneous Human Combustion (SHC) - the first documented case in Ireland, but NOT the first reported. The Indo article never actually explains what Spontaneous Human Combustion is - merely finds that the authorities were able to find no other explanation for the death. Assistant chief fire officer Gerry O'Malley said fire officers were satisfied that, after a thorough investigation, an open fire in Mr Faherty's fireplace was not the cause of the blaze which...

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Everything and everyone is Irish in the end - and now it turns out the that great-great-great-etc grandmother of today's polar bears were in fact from Ireland. This is not some desperate attempt by Ireland to enter a territorial dispute over Arctic resources (we have Rockall, after all) or to distract the populace from the grinding financial crisis. No, it turns out that modern polar bears have carried a particular sequence of DNA via the female line - mitochondria, which they share with prehistoric Irish brown bears - this DNA is absent from other species of brown bear alive today....

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"Severed head of genital disease saint for sale in Ireland" reads the headline in the Belfast Telegraph - A decapitated head, said to be that of St Vitalis of Assisi, the patron saint of genital diseases, will be sold at an auction in Co. Meath next Sunday. Vitalis, was was quite the hardy buck - and had a wild life, presumably punctuated by regular doses of the clap before he settled down to an ascetic lifestyle (or it just fell off and he couldn't misbehave any more). Read more: Read more in the Belly Telly while details of the auction...

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From launch.is "Bitcoin is a P2P currency that could topple governments, destabilize economies and create uncontrollable global bazaars for contraband." Hat-tip to DivneyMathers. Via the (soon to be defunct) Twenty Major Forums.* Image from Cornell University Flickr Commons pool, used under a CC licence. *Update: Nope. We've just been told Twenty is keeping the forum open. Bless.

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I saw these lads on Tuesday night in Scala, London backing up Bell X1. They stole the show. They'll probably despise me for saying it, but they instantly reminded me of a young Police. Catchy tunes, feet-shuffling rhythm sections, superb vocals. This is 'Soon They Will Come'. And yes, that does appear to be Aiden 'Mayor Carcetti' Gillen at the start of the video. Planet Parade Facebook page Previous Friday Choons

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It's from Russia. It's on Youtube. It couldn't possibly be a fake. Via Journal.ie

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The Jurassic Park theme. Just really, really slowly. Thanks to a piece of software called Paulstretch. It stretches things. Found via Rhodri Marsden, Guardian blog. Listen to some more Friday Choons. Image by Mike Shaver, used under a CC licence.

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Image from UK Air Ministry Flickr stream, CC licence. Colour sketch of a 'spaceship' creating crop circles, 1998.