Blatherskite Mark Pilkington has been following the increasingly amusing story of former Mi5 spook David Shayler (once prosecuted for passing secret documents to that most nefarious of Illuminati rags The Mail on Sunday) who now appears to have proclaimed himself, yes, you guessed it, the Messiah. From DaveShayler.com:
To clarify the position: I am the last incarnation of the Holy Ghost (aka the Holy Spirit) or the Yeshua or Jesus Spirit (aka the Christ consciousness). As the Holy Spirit is God incarnate as essence, I am God incarnated as spirit and man. Many cultures have accepted that the gods incarnate as humans, including the Egyptians, the Greeks and the Romans. In the West, this knowledge has been preserved as the unwritten Qabalah, the real secret guarded over the centuries by groups like the Templars and the Rosicrucians.
Yeah, yeah. So, where are the six foot lizards at?
Anyway, many will take this as definitive proof of Shayler’s bona-fides and his paranoias’ justification: as it’s now abundantly clear that THEY got to him, gave him the same happy pills that they gave young Davey Icke and sent him round the feckin’ twist with a rocket up his bearded messianic arse. Oh and, speaking of…
In related ‘beard-botherer with delusions-of-grandeur’ news, Mad Mel McGibbo Gibson has built himself a $37 million church in the Malibu Hills. So far, so benevolent. Only one hitch: the Catholic Church (that’s the one in Rome run by that bloke who says he talks directly to the Big Bearded Bloke in the sky) doesn’t recgonise Mel’s particular branch of Catholicism (The Holy Family Catholic Church) and in fact, doesn’t look kindly on [sniggers, slaps hand off thigh] some of the rather more ‘conservative’ leanings of the organisation. From News.com.au:
Gibson’s secretive sect is not recognised by the Roman Catholic Church because it does not acknowledge the authority of the Pope or the Vatican and rejects the universally accepted teachings of the Second Vatican Council.
The church – which offers a daily morning mass in Latin – follows an antiquated ideology of Catholicism dating back to the 16th century.
Female followers of Gibson’s church must abide by a strict dress code, requiring them to wear veils over their hair and long skirts, with a ban on pants for women.
No pants, eh? Can we join? Can we? Ha?
Anyway, we’re just waiting for Mel to go the whole Discordian hog and declare himself Pope. Get on with it man – we’re waiting. And so are THEY.
A distant relation of mine once declared himself the messiah, in Clapham, around 1902. He became leader of a cult called the Agrapemonites, but as far as I can tell he did it for the access to “spritual brides” that came with the job 🙂
There are many branches of the Catholic church as well as other Christan Denominations who do not recognise or accept the teachings of The Vatican, therefore they are not universal.
To begin with Gibson simply follows a Latin Mass that millions of Catholics practiced before 1962, so it is not antiquated. As a matter of fact, last month Pope Benedict reinstated the Latin Mass for all congregations who choose to do so.
Women are only required to wear a veil over their heads which many Catholic congregations still do in orthodox services.
I’m writing this in the hope that you are now more enlightened and educated about Catholicism. But somehow I don’t think it will make much difference. But at least a pack of lies has been corrected.
Hilarious! Any more mental illness gags you have would be greatly appreciated…