I Can’t Stop

This Californian walks into a bar. The bartender says “Hey. Why don’t you beat up everyone in the bar?” The Californian says “I’ll take a hot buttered rum.” A guy pounds on the bar and yells “I’m gonna take you home and make love to you all night!”
So the Californian starts chanting “Dopey screwed a penguin! Dopey screwed a penguin!”
and
So this monkey walks into a bar. A midget gets close to the monkey and says “Give me a dollar and I’ll pull down your pants.” The monkey says “Are you kidding? I’m a monkey!” The midget looks at the monkey and tosses back a beer and says “I know I don’t know you, but I’d love to give you a night you’ll never forget.”
So the monkey says “You have a drink named Eric?”

barry
Barry Kavanagh writes fiction, and has made music, formerly with Dacianos.

Contact him here.