Year: 2008

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Photo: ©Kim Haughton The first text message to appear on my phone on Friday morning was from a friend of mine, Duncan. It read "I am reading your book ostentatiously on the bus giggling." The second was from Damien. It simply read "destroyed". All over Dublin, survivors of the First Blather Book Launch were dragging themselves out of bed. Others were only just making it to bed. One brave soul had partied all night, and then had to a performance review at her job at 11am. Bless their stamina. The official launch of "A Load of Blather" kicked off at Dublin's Dice Bar at 1800 on Thursday. There wasn't many people there at the time. Sue and I felt overdressed and pretentious. She ate pasta salad. I paced. The barman and one customer were watching Germany vs. Croatia on the TV. Outside, the traffic snorted on Queen St. and confused...

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Burlesque dancer, blogger, artist and purveryor of scandalous filth. Meet Molly Crabapple - the 24-year old brains behind the now world-famous Dr. Sketchy's Cabaret Life Drawing classes and the acclaimed webcomic series "Backstage". Blather.net relentlessly stalked Molly acrosss the internet and hounded her until she talked to us recently caught up with Molly and got her to answer some questions. Blather: Your second name is unusual - Crabapple. Where did it come from? Molly: An old boyfriend gave it to me because he didn't think I was very sweet. Blather: You're perhaps best known for founding Dr. Sketchy's. Tell us about what it is and why you created it. Molly: Dr. Sketchy's is a cabaret life-drawing class. Take a ravishing performer model, get a bunch of drunk artists to draw her, and add in antics and prizes. We started it in NYC in '05, and it's now in 55 cities...

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In the final part of Blather.net's in-depth investigation of the infamous fifth-century thug and womaniser, Niall of the Nine Hostages, our grave-robber in residence Ender Wiggan digs deeper into the genetic history of the indigenous Irish population in an effort to finally find out "who's yo' Daddy?". No really. Who *is* your daddy? Where were we during our last sausage-fest? Tracing Irish genetic origins and the general consensus at the moment... To see what condition our condition is in Well we could start at a 2000 study from Trinity College; Y-chromosome variation and Irish origins where 221 Y-chromosomes from Irish males were partitioned by surname and significant differences in genetic frequency was noted between those of Irish Gaelic names and those of foreign origin (suggesting an influx of later gene flow across the linguistic barrier from historical migrant groups). More importantly a difference was also noted between those of eastern...

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" provides a low-key, entertaining weirdness unmatched elsewhere" - Fortean Times Read the full review here (pdf) » Only € 9.99 + P&P! By Dave Walsh, Barry Kavanagh, Damien DeBarra, Sue Walsh and others Paperback: 144 pages Publisher: Nonsuch Ireland Published May 20th 2008 See photographs and read about the launch party on June 12th, 2008 at the Dice Bar, 78 Queen Street, Dublin and read Damien's account of the night here » Listen to an interview about A Load of Blather with Dave Walsh on Phantom 105.2FM » Eleven years, three convictions, two deportations, ten thousand pints, six barring orders and a legion of leather-clad groupies later, Dave Walsh, Barry Kavanagh and Damien DeBarra (the cheap tarts that brought you Blather.net) bring you their latest labour of love: A Load of Blather: Unreal Reports from Ireland and Beyond, the first book that anyone has been nuts enough to let...

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Scribbling furiously with the bloodied broken stump of a leprechaun's finger, under an apocalyptic cloud of molten ash and flames; blather.nets 'end of days' emissary, Ender Wiggan, concludes the I, Patrick saga, concerning the real life and times of the blow in from Britain. With Extreme Prejudice Int. British Monastery Kitchen (5H CENTURY) - Day FR. CORMAN "Brother Willard, you ever hear of a man called Patricius?" BR. WILLARD "Yes, sir, I've heard the name." FR. LUCAS "A deacon, attached to Carlisle" FR. CORMAN "Luke, would you read that letter for the Brother, please. Listen carefully." FR. LUCAS (READING) "I, Patricius...a sinner and one truly unlearned... FR. CORMAN "This was sent out of Ireland. This has been verified as Fr. Patricius handwriting." FR. LUCAS (READING) “...the riches which he has unjustly gathered will be vomited from his belly, the angel of death will hand him over to be crushed by...

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'No Thoroughfare on The Tram Road: History of Clontarf and its Environs' by historian Val Lynch is a charming local history book which many northside Dubliners may have seen knocking around in newsagents and shops. Being from the area myself, I have an obvious interest. Whilst I am all for local history (something which we here on blather.net have always been fans of) one does have to worry when such books simply repeat stories about local legends and folklore. In the book I've just mentioned, there is an excellent example: the story of the 'Mysterious Underground Tunnels Under Clontarf'. The fact is, the story is nonsense. How do I know? Because I was part of the group that (inadvertently) made the whole thing up. So, how did it happen? Well, at the time I was a semi-regular poster to an Irish discussion forum - the mighty p45.net ('wasting time at work')...

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This time two months ago, I was in Tasmania - and I saw my first Tasmanian Devils up close. While generally deeply interested (perhaps obsessed) by wildlife, encountering Tassie devils was high on my list - and these photographs are the fruits of my labours. Now, a Tasmanian devil superhero named Cedric has made news this week, after scientists found that his genes may save the species from extinction. This time two months ago, I was in Tasmania - and I saw my first Tasmanian Devils up close. While generally deeply interested (perhaps obsessed) by wildlife, encountering Tassie devils was high on my list - and these photographs are the fruits of my labours. Now, a Tasmanian devil named Cedric has made news this week, after scientists found that his genes may save the species from extinction. Tasmanian Devils - now the largest carnivorous marsupial following the apparent demise of...

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View Larger Map For the last two decades we've been keeping track of every lake monster, UFO sighting, Satanist, pornographer, ghost and ghost hunter, exorcism and exorcist, Banshee attack, ABC sighting, religious quack, police state action, alien abduction and friendly neighbourhood Kangaroo that we can commit to writing. But the truth is, there's such an abundance of these things that keeping track of them has become somewhat problematic. Until now. So allow us reader dear, to present 'Blather.net's Map of the Weird', a first public presentation of what will become an ever-growing, all-encompassing cartographic apocalypse of filth, depravity, smut and Forteana. Anyway, the above image only shows a snippet of the map, specifically for Ireland (our home). Below is a slightly larger section: View Larger Map View in Google Earth A map's not good enough for you, is it? Eh? Grand, well then view the thing in Google Earth by right-clicking...

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And a happy St. Patrick's Day to you to be sure, to be sure. Join us for the latest thrilling instalment of the tale of the young St. Patrick, as the young Welshman (yes, he was Welsh) saddles up with a galloping gang of leather-cloaked horsemen with half-shaved heads, armed to the teeth with swords, spears and assorted cooking implements of destruction who set off about Ireland with the express intention of learnin' us Paddies some manners. Or something. There's a scene near the start of 'The Mission', with Jeremy Irons alone and vulnerable, dangerously clambering up a gigantic waterfall in order to reach a new native territory; watched anxiously by his fellow Jesuits below. After some time, Liam Neeson asks (in a big potato-head accent) “Can you see him?”, to which his friend slowly shakes his head in response. Patrick disappeared beyond his own waterfall, beyond 'the ends of...

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Blogging live from a 5th century Romano-British whorehouse on the west coast of Wales, Blather.net's chief bodythief, time-travelling mercenary and ambassador to the Medieval period, Ender Wiggan, enthralls us once again with the fourth part of his epic series on the life of the young St. Patrick. This time, St. Patrick has some trouble back in the office. Havent read "I, Patrick: Puke the First"? Click here. Don't you just hate coming back to the office after a foreign business trip...and having everyone whispering about you behind you're back? You get to your desk and find a memo from the boss saying, 'See me at once'. 'Excellent', you think, 'I bet its about that promotion I went for last week'. You set off cheerfully, thinking everyone is probably acting strange because they're jealous. You get to the bosses room, open the door nonchalantly...to find the whole board of directors looking...